Profits and Losses
As I sat in my living room, engaging in a bit of a pity party for myself, I tried to be objective about 2015. It was a devastating year. I felt like my life would end almost every day. Despite how I felt, I had to choose to push through and I accomplished a lot. I did lose a lot as well.
I had to give up my job due to the intense pain and fatigue. I lost 25lbs, mostly muscle. So, I lost stamina and strength. I lost the ability to read and speak for a while. I couldn’t keep up with our property management company either. I fell behind in payments and lost two houses. I lost a position of connectivity in pro-life advocacy. I lost some relationships due to inactivity. I declined speaking engagements and skipped events.
Having doctors who believed me and did the right tests to confirm a diagnosis was a huge gain. I did what I could do, as far as chores, communicating on social media, getting places, and working on projects. I gave speeches and interviews. I took care of my mother-in-law after an accident, so she could have her life back. I actively participated in pro-life and anti-trafficking events. The most important thing I did this year was learn. I learned about Lyme and co-infections, about neuroscience, about the prevalence of child sexual abuse, about working with technology a little, but mostly, I learned about myself.
Perhaps, you can find yourself in what I learned too.
People are all unique individuals with diverse attitudes and perspectives. Our experiences, personality traits, and physiology play a role in who we are. There is no point at which who we are, is who we must remain. Every one of us is living on a continuum in time and we have the potential for change at any point. A person can completely change their life trajectory. We choose who we become everyday.
Here are the things I’ll be working on.
- Because I have tendency to minimize accomplishments and magnify insufficiencies, I will work on humility.
- Because I have a do or die attitude, I will work on planning and consistency.
- Because I have a strong desire to make a difference while remaining under the radar, I will work on mentoring others.
- Because I have an absolute trust that there is a purpose for every single person’s life, I will work on promoting the dignity of diversity.
- Because I have some clarity about the human experience, I will work on being patient with myself and with others.
Most people take account of the year as it closes. Some will do actual accounting and goal setting. Others will reflect on the overall profits and losses. What are some things you’ll be working on in 2016?