My Grandma Gave Me a Bible
My mother’s second husband adopted my sister and me. His mother gave me a Bible. I don’t remember going to church at that age, though I did. The only church I remembered was the Catholic church that my abusers took me to as a toddler. I read that Bible and it changed my heart. I will forever be grateful my grandma gave me a Bible.
Growing up
I began to recognize that other people had pain and problems. I wanted to be helpful. But, I didn’t know how and I had terrible coping mechanisms. I wanted to be pure, like Mary, the mother of Jesus. Of course, I knew that I could never be her. I wanted to be like her, to do something wonderful for people. But I was full of imposed shame and misplaced guilt.
Child abuse doesn’t just go away with the passage of time. It has to be dealt with. I was making some headway reading that Bible. I started to believe that I could be part of the family of God; that I could be kind and that I could learn. Only, I thought people needed to know how to be worthy of love.
After my mother’s second divorce, we lived in an apartment. She frequently had others living there for weeks or months. There were drugs, alcohol, smoking, and inappropriate sexual relationships all the time. An uncle molested me. One of my grandmother’s friends molested me. It was a mess. I put the Bible away and tried to cope with that life alone.
We Are Worthy
When I was 18, I picked up another Bible. This time I didn’t put it down. I used it to heal from the horrific torment that accompanies abuse and juvenile sex trafficking. When my grandma gave me a Bible, I’m sure she knew how much we need to know. I found out that God loved me and I didn’t have to do anything to be worthy.
Often, I used it to teach my children. I used it to strengthen myself, when I felt weak. I used it to humble myself, when I felt like boasting. There is so much in it to learn about people, about their worlds, about how God wanted things to be, and about the devil. I use it now to help me get through the effects of untreated Lyme disease. It is a guide for making decisions.
There is no other book like it in all the world. It really has the power to transform lives. Even as a child, it made a difference. I tried to do the things written in it. It made me want to be good. “Train up a child in the way they should go and when they are older they will not depart from it.” Proverbs 22:6 Even if we stray for a time, we can always come back.
Children need to know they are loved, without having to earn it and without having to suffer in the name of love. They need to know that love is patient, love is kind. Love doesn’t seek its own way. True love never fails. 1 Corinthians 13
If you’re reading this, you need to know it too. Tell the children in your sphere of influence that God loves them and that He demands nothing in exchange for that love. He does have rules for our good as we navigate life on earth, but His love never fails.
Help them learn good coping mechanisms.
Take a moment
When something awful happens, take a deep breath. Try to think about it in different ways. Could it have been an accident? Was it a mistake? What will happen if you do nothing? What will happen if you do what you feel like doing?
Respond instead of reacting
When you take a moment to think about what’s happening, you can respond more appropriately. You have taken time to consider the situation, others’ responses, and the implications for all concerned. Will my response do any good?
Keep eternity in mind
The Scripture tells us how to behave. There are loads of passages that help us deal with all of what goes on around us. God has given us the Bible to help us. We can know what to say or what to do. When we spend time getting to know His words, we will have an eternal perspective. My grandma gave me a Bible so that I would know. It says that there is an appointed time for each of us to die and after this, the judgement. Hebrews 9:27
There are three mentioned above. Would you share more? Maybe there was a time that you can think of that you did use one or more of them that you could share.